You keep asking you it hurts so much.

You keep asking why. And eventually you realise you'll never get answers.

Remain unanswered, and you plunge yourself into further depths of depression and confusion.

My mentality is too childish, I can't take it when I'm not cared for.

I need to grow up.

I know, people hate to see me happy, they delight at me feeling sad.

Who gives a fuck about your foolish and ambitious dream? There's the few who do care, but... The most important people in your life can no longer be bothered about you. Heartache.

No, I'm not talking about her. I'm very contented if we can be friends, with that, I'm appeased.

OK, studies is for our own good. If you don't get good qualifications, you won't be able to live in this society. I know you mean well, but -

OK, I'm not very expressive, I can't put it in words, I can't explain it either.

Other people care, they try to pull you up, they try to wake you up. But though it's very nice of them, it's just the few of them. What happened to you people that I refer to as " important people" in my life?

Perhaps they didn't know what they did and said had such an effect on me. They throw me into a chasm, and I lower myself even more into it.

I'm beginning to think less like a person of my age. Deteriorating.

No good. Continue saying that I'm useless. Say I'm retarded. Say you want me to live your dream. Say I'm a fool. Say I'm clouded. Say I'm deluded. Say you want me to go to a university. Say all you want.

Ever heard of a useless, retarded fool going to university?

Your words, they shook me. And the next day you talk to me as though nothing had happened. You expect me to start mugging after what you said?

I'm that sentimental little kid that cares what you say, can you not crush me like that?

Oh, too late.

I desperately want concern. I desperately seek concern. And I'm gradually losing the concern that people shower upon me.

I seriously don't know what the fuck is wrong with me.

Can I not? NO, YOU MUST! YOU MUST, OR I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU.

Officially lost it. Can you care? Can you care? Can you care? Can you care? Can you care? Can you care? Can you care? Can you care? Can you care? Can you care?

CAN YOU CARE? PLEASE? No, fuck off.

I understand, we all have our own matters to settle. In fact, we all got O's. No one in the right mind is going to discard their O's just to care for a prick like me. You go do your thing, I'll remain traumatised, here.

Overwrite me, please. Not few can do it with such ease.

White elephant in the corner, got picked up, dusted, and thrown into the bin.

Don't believe what I say, I'm merely a kid with a twisted mind.

A kid who likes to whine about his troubles, but, that's not all there is to it.

You guys go study.

I'm disgusted that Kai Sheng has hardly matured at all. In fact, he grew younger and more childish in his thinking. My useless child. My dork-ish friend. The hopeless stranger. The nosy fuck. I'm sick and disgusted by him. I WILL IGNORE HIM. I WILL IGNORE HIM. I WILL IGNORE HIS DESPERATE PLEA FOR HELP. I WILL IGNORE HIS DESIRE FOR ATTENTION.

I might break down during PTM, and I might not be able to explain it.

Emotionally unstable after all. Ha ha, 16 years old, yet still so fucked up.

I didn't know George had to get consultation at IMH, he must have been joking. Wait, perhaps that's why it is so fun to talk to him.

Everything fell apart after the 16th birthday. How sweet the sweet 16.

I cling. Sometimes is not what you say that hurts, it's when you say nothing, as though you couldn't be bothered, that hurts.

I don't care. You're a man now. I'll keep dishing hurtful things at you as though you're impervious to it.

Impervious is a funny word.