Look, I stopped blogging about how sad I was about her since 25 June or so. I don't know how you managed to come up with that conclusion at this point of time.

I'm already OK with it. I'm already glad that she cares, so, shh, please.

My recent posts refers to " them ". Them. Them. It's them, not her.

I get brought down and discouraged by people, intentionally and also unintentionally.

Look how fast my motivation died out today.

I need to get back to the life of denial. I have to stop living the life of denying the denial.

Miracles won't happen. Hardly anyone cares.

Why'd they want me to die so badly? Why'd they keep me alive at the same time? Why can't they care?

DILEMMA, FUCK. Perhaps I need some serious counselling.

Hm, so please don't say anything till you really now what's going on.

My life is good. A tad bit too good. FUCKING INGRATE. I WILL KILL THE INGRATE. INGRATE THAT I AM.

They love you, oh yes they do. I'm such a jerk. They made me a jerk. No, I made myself a jerk.